A Mind is a Terrible thing to Waste.

•November 23, 2013 • 1 Comment

kimmyThe sky, still dark on a cold November morning is as mysterious as my thoughts.
I rub sleep from my eye, and contemplate genealogy as the coffeemaker hisses and brews.
I am thankful for the quiet of the early morning, a respite from the busy day ahead, as much as the inevitable awakening of my sister. Equal parts guilt and shame are transmitted by my brain pre coffee and rush to cover me like a blanket.

The warm coffee and its aroma do little to soothe my mind or soften these feelings. I try to sit still and savor the quiet moments of my first cup. Smoke from my cigarette swirls and drifts as surely as the thoughts I fight to keep suppressed. Just like my sisters awakening, it is impossible to keep the thoughts down for long.

Has it been only a week? It seems as though it has been a lifetime. Actually it has, I know it as I reach for the pot and fill a second cup. I… No, we as a family have known for as long as I remember that something was wrong.
Just as we have simply ignored or put aside the uncomfortable feelings as a way to avoid or hide from the reality of her illness. Now it has come to the surface some years later, and is residing twenty feet from me.
I remember as well, twenty years ago the hope and relief we all felt when her behaviors were given a diagnosis. It comforts me little now, but I do remember thinking at the time “Bipolar, cant be so bad. Drugs can control it, or offer some hope?”

Again, guilt rushes over me as I hear her voice. I cringe, knowing my peace is about to be broken, and my guilt is overwhelming as I realize she can find no peace in her mind.

I feel guilt over the irritation I have felt with her. Years of cleaning up after her drug abuse, her insane behaviors, and the mess associated with her lifestyle. I realize that none of it was by choice. rather the aftermath of her “disorder.” I wish I could take back some of the anger I showed her, some of the lectures I delivered, knowing now they simply did not compute. But I can’t. All I can offer now is love, understanding and hope. That frustrates me to no end. Twenty years of modern therapy and medicine as wasted as this life before me.

I pour her a cup of coffee and we sit in our own worlds, our mutual silence, as different as the workings of our minds. I watch as she struggles to drink a cup of coffee without spilling it everywhere. I bring napkins, just like the thousands of napkins I walk around cleaning up after a day of her suffering fidgeting.

In the early morning light I watch her lost in her own mind, her eyes flicker with a combination of the young girl she used to be and fear. I see her face, once young and pretty, now etched with and showing the wrinkles of time and a life of fear and worry. Four years younger than I, she now looks twenty years older.

She thanks me profusely for the coffee and a multitude of things as they swirl through her unsettled mind. I feel guilt about that as well.
As our mother joins us for Coffee, Kim speaks of our younger brother, deceased for nearly a decade now. Tears fall from her face as my Mother dies a little inside for all her kids.
We speak in silence, each of us lost in our own thoughts now. Ironically the same way we handled my sisters “Condition” for the last twenty years.

I excuse myself as they continue a conversation without words. I feel guilt that I have no power to change any of it. We exchange an “I love you” amongst our loud silence.

I return to my computer where I continue to make assisted living plans for my younger sister. My heart breaks for her, and all I can think of is a failed saying from a failed war on drugs. “A mind is a terrible thing to waste.”

Indiegogo Crowd Funding Campaign.

•July 23, 2013 • Leave a Comment

dharbphotofuniaWe have kicked off a crowd funding campaign on Indiegogo to produce the next two books in the Jack Cross Mysteries Trilogy. Live now on Indiegogo! You can become a Contributor for as little as $1.00. Or view the Perks packages for various levels of participation. We already have a contributor lined up to name a character! Join us and share even if you can not participate financially. See the link in the Blogroll located on the right side of the page. Thanks ~JKD

From the Mouths of Babes

•April 17, 2013 • 2 Comments

nomorehurtingpeople

This will not be another typical piece on the tragedy in Boston. I think the incident had a much more profound effect on me than to spend time and type space telling you what you already know. Terror is horrible, be it foreign or domestic.
You also clearly understand the people of Boston and New England are tough and resilient. You have formed your own opinions as to how heroic and wonderful the reaction of the first responders and the citizens of the great city and region are, judging by their reactions in the immediate aftermath.

Instead, I want to share the thoughts that surprised even me. My mind raced back, to the immediate aftermath of 9-11. I can still recall the hatred, anger and furious need for justice that prevailed. I joined in wholeheartedly in wanting to hit back at someone or something. Now for selfish reasons, I would like to profess that perhaps I had matured and grown as a human being, one who has come to grips with the lessons of the years that followed that event, the loss of life of thousands of Americans, and hundreds of thousands of people in the Middle East. I would like to tell you that, but it wouldn’t be the whole truth.
I had the same sick feeling, the same horror for the people of a town I once called home, but something was different. I couldn’t muster hatred through my confusion. I felt a tad bit guilty, that I would not be joining in the rush for retribution and flag waving that I anticipated would ensue.

Sometimes you must concur with whatever is said to you to keep the peace, to maintain calm. Situations that involve terrible consequences may require a delicate, quiet touch. Sheathe the saber, holster the gun, speak softly. This was the course my mind took on that day, and those that have followed.

Instead my mind kept racing back to one image, the image of an eight year old boy. He was holding a sign. The sign contained few words and a symbol.

“No more hurting each other.” Peace.

Words that broke my heart, and changed my life.

I realized in that moment, I was still embrolied in a terror event, one with my own soul. I had been at war with everyone since 9-11 and the years that followed.
I had eagerly joined in the cry for war and revenge following 9-11. Perhaps looking for a way to heal my own confused and battered soul. I have spent the last years at war with my own intellect following the realization I blindly joined in the war cry for Iraq and Afghanastan.

Despite my attempts to make it right by opposing the party that led us there, and the political wars that have been raged in this country since, I still couldn’t find peace with it, nor God for many reasons personally. I took my anger and rage and poured it in to opposing politically all who believed differently.

And nothing changed. In many ways, it only made it worse. I have alientated family and friend alike with my political beliefs, and truthfully thought nothing of doing so. I may have been right in my beliefs, and I’m certainly not suggesting this new found peace I have found will change my ideology in the least bit. Nor do I believe it will change my relationship with god.

But what I do now understand and feel badly about, can be summed up in the few words and a symbol,shared by eight year old Martin Richard. “no more hurting each other.” Peace.

So I have come to the conclusion that if I hurt you, if I offended you with my rage, anger and opinions, please accept my apology. Sometimes being right is wrong.

The boy’s father, William Richard, is a community leader in the Ashmont section of Dorchester, according to the Globe.

“My dear son Martin has died from injuries sustained in the attack on Boston,” Richard said in a statement Tuesday. “My wife and daughter are both recovering from serious injuries. We thank our family and friends, those we know and those we have never met, for their thoughts and prayers. I ask that you continue to pray for my family as we remember Martin. We also ask for your patience and for privacy as we work to simultaneously grieve and recover. Thank you.”

What gives me the right to not have the same grace and humility as the father who lost so much that day? No amount of anger or rage, nor a rush to seek vengence will return eight year old Martin to the baseball fields where he was just learning to play. Nor will our collective anger and rage change a thing.

Lets let justice take it’s time and get it right this time. And I for one have learned a lesson and take some understanding from another horribly tragic event. Perhaps I can become a better person.

From the mouths of babes. Thank you Martin.
~JKD

For Immidiate Release

•April 4, 2013 • Leave a Comment

dharbphotofunia

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Poor Boy Press And Author J.K. Dark Present Dark Harbors
A compelling work of Tropical Noir.

April 4, 2013: Poor Boy Press and author J.K. Dark are proud to announce the official publication of Dark Harbors, a compelling work of Tropical Noir.

About The Book
In Dark Harbors, J.K. Dark delivers a fast-paced, believable mystery set in the Florida Keys. His use of captivating characters and settings draws you quickly in and will keep you turning the pages.
Dark’s fluid style of writing brings you face-to-face with Jack Cross, an aging rocker who was once at the top of the “sex, drugs, and rock & roll” scene with his band, The Pirates of Rock. Jack made money – lots of money – but he also made a series of bad choices in his life that led to a drug-propelled slide from the
top.
Through it all, Jack managed to hang onto his yacht, The Dark Cross, which he operates as part of a marginally successful charter cruise business out of Key West. It’s on just such a cruise that Jack relives his past and confronts his future. On his cruises into the Gulf of Mexico and the Caribbean, he ventures
into waters once inhabited by pirates searching for Spanish gold, but times really haven’t changed: pirates still exist…in fact, Jack is a pirate on many levels.

For an enticing preview of Dark Harbors, visit Dark’s official blog to view its compelling book trailer:http://www.onthedarkside.wordpress.com.

Dark Harbors is available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and other retailers. For more information,please visit http://www.onthedarkside.wordpress.com.

About The Author
J.K. Dark is a freelance writer/author residing in St. Louis, Missouri. He contributes to the ezineTaboojive.com, and he is also the author of two books, Anecdotes, Short Stories, & Mind Clutter and DarkThoughts & Dark Forces.

To learn more about J.K. Dark, visit http://www.onthedarkside.wordpress.com.

The Reviews are In.

•March 22, 2013 • Leave a Comment

Dark Harborsfinalcover

“What an achievement! Even after I finished this great book, I’m still held in its grasp.   What an exciting look into the life of a modern day pirate. Wow, what a ride! Well done!”

~ Jonas Saul, author of The Specter

DARK HARBORS is delightfully crafted to lure you deeper and deeper into the depths of the captivating tale. It’s perfectly satisfying to lose yourself in picking up the nuggets of clues as the story unfolds, firmly netted in the rising suspense. It is truly a treasure of a dark and twisted tale.

~ Kyrja, author of Mi’s Search for Beauty and Rupert’s Tales

“Masterfully written, wonderfully intriguing, and completely original, DARK HARBORS, will grab hold of you, and not let go until the last page is turned! J.K. Dark is quickly emerging as one of the elite writers in the world of fiction.”

“A must read for 2013″ ~ CK Webb co-author of Cruelty to Innocents and Collecting Innocents

Dark Harbors is a totally engrossing, hypnotically readable Tropical Noir about a retired Rock Star, living out his dream life in a tropical paradise.

But the tropics house more than an idyllic sunny days and diamond star filled nights.

Paradise can be pure hell.

J. K. Dark is a highly skilled author who weaves a tale of wonder and terror.

You will be drawn into these warm waters and have your blood run cold as the tension tightens.

Dark Harbors is a book you do not want to miss.

—B.L. Morgan author of Red Simon: Vampire Punk

“Dark Harbors is speckled with beautifully wounded imagery…remorsefully enthralling adventure, rock and roll and rites of passage into the abyss. J.K.Dark has written something akin to a jewel from a Pirates booty.. His extremely well developed characters and masterful story telling makes one feel like they are reading non-fiction, drawn from his own experience. This book transcends the mediocrity and transports the reader to a new reality. I await the release of this piece of high art on the high seas with baited breath.”

-David Rat- Recording Artist and Author of HAPPY ENDING

In Dark Harbors J. K Dark delivers a fast paced, believable mystery set in the Florida Keys. His use of captivating characters and settings draws you quickly in and will keep you turning the pages. Dark’s fluid style of writing brings you face to face with Jack Cross, an aging rocker who was once at the top of the “sex, drugs, and rock & roll” scene with his band, The Pirates of Rock. Jack made money-lots of money, but also made a series of bad choices in his life that led a drug-propelled slide from the top. Through it all Jack managed to hang onto his yacht, The Dark Cross, which he operates as part of a marginally successful charter cruise business out of Key West. It’s on just such a cruise that Jack relives his past and confronts his future. On his cruises into the Gulf of Mexico and the Caribbean, Waters once inhabited by pirates searching for Spanish gold, but times really haven’t changed. Pirates still exist. In fact, Jack is a pirate on many levels.

If you have read Anecdotes, Short Stories & Mind Clutter or Dark Thoughts and Dark Forces then you are already a J. K. Dark fan. If you haven’t, you soon will be after reading Dark Harbors.

~ T. C. Isbell Author Southern Cross

Of Cherry Trees, Vaginas & Arithmetic. The Demise of the GOP.

•November 8, 2012 • Leave a Comment

 Of Cherry Trees, Vaginas & Arithmetic, the Demise of the GOP.

Once upon a time in our America, an election was lost, but the power and voice of the people were heard. It was the majority of the people. The system worked, just as the founding fathers had intended.

This angers a faction of the populace, the same populace that revived the image of the founding fathers and paraded them for the last 4 years like a corporate logo. In perhaps the worst rebranding of a corporation or party in history, the False Patriots of the land roared. Their so called grass roots movement founded and financed by the Koch brothers and dirty corporate money, an oxymoron to the logo they sought to buy.

The cries of ‘I want my country back’ ringing in the ears of an otherwise majority who at the time sought to embrace ‘hope and change.’ This abomination of a movement bought their way in to the political process, and bought Senate and House seats. Their reach ranging far and wide within two years, perhaps a movement who’s roots then became exposed. It turned out they were the roots of the Graying white rich male. Their dastardly plot had its true roots on the eve of the inauguration of the newly elected President.

Together with the corporations for which they stood, one nation became disposable under the guise of God.

They systematically began attacking the very foundation of the country and for which it stood.

Public Service Employees, Unions, Teachers, every institution, every agreement, every social program was under attack, in an attempt to not only hold on to the status quo of the old rich white male, but force the nation into a revival of the guilded age. No one or anything was safe from their reach. Including, but certainly not limited to the newly elected first African American President.

This ‘Grass Roots’ movement, organized, financed and given legitimacy by its very own propaganda machine of Fox news, right wing talk radio pundits and right wing journalists, supported the campaign to deny and destroy. And they stopped at nothing. They were fueled by the hatred and greed of the old white male. Also given the rubber stamped guise of God as the evangelical faction of the country joined in the fun. They had after all been experts at serving Kool-aid to their followers for centuries.

Facts were no longer facts. Once they became discredited by the machine.

Icons of publishing and broadcasting, together with the institutions for which they worked were reframed as ‘The Lame stream media.’ The tag was affixed to any publication or media outlet that stood in the way of their propaganda.

This ugly machine and its mechanics even ate their own. Moderate or reasonable politicians were threatened with primaries filled with the False Patriots radical extremists unless they complied with the marching orders.

This “Tea Party” was instead serving a Kool-Aid mixture comprised of hatred, lies and propaganda to further their agenda. And an otherwise naive percentage of the population lined up for their turn at the trough to drink the Kool-Aid.

And drink from the trough they did, with great gusto! They aligned themselves with politicians who instead of taking the Pledge of Allegiance, opted for the new corporate pledge, The Grover Norquist pledge to under no circumstances vote to increase taxes upon the old graying white males to whom they were now indebted.

The Tea Party boys, fueled with vitriol and flush with money from the corporations and special interests for which they stood, captured Seats in the House of Representatives and the Senate’s, state and federal. They captured Governorships in many key states. And then, they went about the work of the party.

They immediately went after unions, collective bargaining rights, Education, Teachers, police, firefighters, no one doing the publics business was safe.

In an effort to please the evangelical wing of the party, they went about introducing bill after bill to control women’s right to choice. They gerrymandered the house districts in an attempt to maintain the power base they had created. In their spare time they enacted other assorted laws prepared not by legislators, but the corporate wing for which they stood. Yes they had bought a team of lawyers to write their own legislation. Alec.

All possible thanks to a gift from the prior incompetent administration. These “Job Creators” flush with cash from record profits and eight years of the Bush tax cuts, had been handed the ultimate gift from the prior administrations appointees to the Supreme Court. As part of the rebranding, this legislation was called “Citizens United.” This finely named piece of legislation was designed to allow these so called job creators to funnel money unnamed to their very own “Super pacs.” It is now funny, not one picketer who was on the street waving the flag, wearing wigs and crying out “we want our country back,” Benefited from this “Citizens United.” Only the dark money of the corporations and elitists seemed to flow to the patriotic organizations in secrecy.

Meanwhile the propaganda machine churned away. Calls for eliminating federal spending, every federal protection from the environmental protection agency, to ultimately the right to even vote were targeted and sold like the corporations latest product on Fox news.

In addition these fine legislators and patriots, worked tirelessly when they were not busy dismantling rights, to obstruct the newly elected President at every turn. Exactly as the ‘Founding Fathers of the Tea Party had planned.

The country itself sacrificed to high unemployment, crushing debt caused by the deficits of the prior administrations insistence on two unfunded wars, and a give away to their friends at the Pharmaceutical industry. Also under the guise of a patriotic program to help the retired afford the outrageous prescription drugs that keep us all functioning and alive.

The only thing standing in the way of these fine False Patriots remained a Democratic majority in the Senate, and the newly elected President with veto power and a few executive powers to pass legislation.

Cue the propaganda machine and obstructionist House of Representatives! How dare that bastard tackle the health care crisis of the nation? How dare he discuss returning our tax rates to pre George W Bush rates!

They went about calling this fine man everything in the world, except the one word they didn’t have the guts to call him, which was “Nigger.” No our False Patriots didn’t want their own base to know they were racists! I for one would have at least respected them for telling the truth.

After all the work that went in to recruiting all seven blacks to their party of inclusion. Not to mention Hermann Cain might quit campaigning and making stupid statements.

Instead he endured 4 years of innuendos, “lazy, not like us, not a real American, calls for his birth certificate, Muslim’ and on and on.

They tried to degrade the man, and instead degraded themselves and the validity of their party in the process.

And then came the Presidential campaign. It was awash in dirty ads and few specifics. The Republicans candidate was picked from a pathetic field only after pandering to every special interest and extremist in the party. All first and foremost sworn to uphold the strict standard set forth by the great Patriot Grover Norquist. Who proclaimed for the world what the qualifications of any potential pick need be. “We don’t need a great thinker he proclaimed. We need a candidate who is breathing and able to use a pen., we can propose the legislation he need only sign it.”

And so came Mitt Romney. As the world soon witnessed, he had all the attributes Grover required, and not much else. And as a bonus, he could lie. Frankly he could lie like no one before him. During the campaign, he amassed a record 917 confirmed and fact checked lies in 41 weeks, Incredible.

And that brings us to the very core of why not only the Republicans lost the election by a sound margin, but also why in it’s aftermath they have behaved like children.

Two days removed from what should have been a wake up call for the Republican Party and their followers, they are still in denial. Busy not only attacking one another over the failure of the election, but now so firmly entrenched in the lies they told themselves and tried in a failed attempt to sell the country, they may actually believe them.

Folks, this is a wake up call for you! You are Americans for god sake; begin to act like it again please. The time to be divisive and fight, yes even root against your own self interests and the well being of the country has ended. YOU LOST!

So as a fellow American, who cares about all Americans and the well being of the country. Perhaps you need a primer to re indoctrinate you to reality?

I have put together a short list of suggestions to aid in your return to a reality based society.

  1. Admit: the core issue: You are not a Patriot. Take the dumb assed hats and Tea Bags off your heads, you just look foolish.
  2. Stop: trying to twist bits and pieces of the constitution to suit the party rhetoric. You are no Thomas Paine.
  3. Admit: When you read: “we the people, for the people, and by the people.” You signed on to join a socialist society for the good of all citizens. A Liberal is no more socialist than you are.
  4. Stop:denying the deficit you have decried for 4 plus years was the direct result of your parties two unfunded wars, and a give away to the pharmaceutical industry by George W Bush. Just stop it and admit it.
  5. Admit: No Republican president has balanced a budget since Eisenhower.
  6. Realize: No one any of us know, has ever met a free spending Liberal, willing to      print money and give away at will to create deficits. Fun fact: liberals      have delivered more surpluses and reduced deficits, than any Republican in      history.
  7. Deal with it: Milton Friedman the economist who brought us Reagan’s “Trickle      Down” economics has been proven wrong. We have 30 plus years of data to      prove it.
  8. Admit: the speeches you have been giving about Patriotism and the flawed theories and bad facts and figures you have used to support these idiotic positions have been captured as talking points from a Fox News program or from the Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck talk radio programs. You never did any research that went beyond their websites or the link to the Heritage foundation.
  9. Admit:corporate welfare is a far bigger problem than social welfare ever has  been or will be. And for god sake, admit your taxes are not supporting people on welfare. Odds are, you received a tax refund last year.
  10. Admit:Social Security had not contributed one red cent to any deficit in this country. It is fully funded and paid for by the recipients and collected  as a payroll tax. Just like unemployment. Both of which are collected and deducted on the payroll stub as ‘insurance.”
  11. Admit: The only voter fraud factually found has odds less than you being abducted by an Alien spacecraft. The voter fraud suspected and proven has been perpetuated by the Republican Party or their subordinates. Including but not limited to the voter suppression efforts exhibited by the Party in this last election cycle.
  12. Admit: the Republican party, the false barer of flag waving Tea Party Patriots, failed in their basic premise of Freedom, by trying to impose their beliefs and views in the woman’s right to choose.
  13. Admit:we are not a ‘Christian Nation.” The founding fathers went out of their way to exclude religion from government. And a majority of the population wants it that way.
  14. Admit:the United Nations and the President are not trying to take your damn squirrel rifle. (Although from some of the stupid threats on social media,perhaps they should.)
  15. Admit:the election is over, you lost. Stop being a whiney bad loser, come back and join fellow Americans in rooting for the well being of the country.

Now please get down off that high horse, put ye ole musket down before you hurt yourself or a fellow citizen. Please understand, the Republicans lost for the following reasons.

First and foremost, the lesson of George Washington and his childhood words should ring throughout the land. “I cannot lie; it was I who chopped down the cherry tree.” Mitt Romney and the GOP tried to lie to the American public, it failed.

Secondly: Women throughout the land spoke loud and clear. They do not want your small government regulating their vaginas.

Thirdly: Arithmetic. Mitt Romney’s plan for America didn’t add up, either mathematically or emotionally with the majority of the electorate. You lose, end of story.

I hope this has been helpful, informative and perhaps slightly humorous to you and aids in the recovery from Right wing nutcase to American citizen again. Please come back, join us and let’s get to work to solve the serious problems before us. We can and will return this to the greatest country on earth, one with freedom, and justice for all. Not just the chosen few of any economic status, racial demographic or religious affiliation.

~JKD

Review of Dark thoughts & Dark Forces

•July 13, 2012 • Leave a Comment

This great review of the book was provided by WebbWeaver. Order a copy today !

 

http://webbweaver-zelda555.blogspot.com/2012/07/book-review-of-dark-thoughts-and-dark.html